Google Me This

Okay, it's truly starting to creep me out how many people get to my blog by putting in search phrases that would normally land them on a vile & disturbing p@rn page. I really don't want to put the phrases in this blog entry because it'll end up sending more of the hapless pervs here. While I appreciate and applaud the right for anyone to want to look at consensual adults doing things they wanna do, (no kids or animals, please! and consenting is an important word) I DON'T want to 1. look at it myself 2. have it pop up on google every time I put what I think is an innocuous search term into the thing. I put the "counter" on the page cause I wanted to see how many people were visiting, where they came from. I saw wonderful "google fiction" on estella's blog, and thought, wow, I wonder what people will get to my blog with?

Granted, they don't appear to spend much time on my site-- there are no nasty videos here, thank you very much. Aside from some search phrases that make me laugh-- "weight watchers stuff" and "luby's" and a really weird one about "TJ Maxx," and "Flannery O'Connor and a stoat" (what were they looking for?!)-- there are people trolling about for p@rn who think a website with a title "kim procrastinates" is a likely place to shop. It's really begun to make me very self-conscious about the words I use. Google is a "whole word" index-- it lists every word on your website and people with very loose search strings will see a match when there isn't one. But what words will get the deviants here? I shudder to think. The funny thing about it is that I can put phrases like "Little Women" into google and get p@rn. I don't understand why they're having so much trouble finding it that they have to search the ninth hit on the list. It's really easy. Just put the word P@RN into your search engine and you'll find it, dudes & dudettes!! (And I'm really wishing I hadn't written the word p@rn so many times here, and am thinking about adding a subterfuge to get it out of google.)

Look at the definition of procrastinate, please. It's not PROCREATE. Go elsewhere for your jollies, thank you.